What do you do when worry takes over?

What can you do when worry takes over your child and they just seem to worry too much?

Do they have dread when they get out of bed?  Do their tempers flare? 

The way that Dawn Huebner explains things in her book series written for ages 8-12 and their families continues to be leading edge.  Her simple metaphoric ways of explaining emotions with very practical exercises is lifechanging for families who are struggling to help support their kids.  These books were all essential tools in my parent toolkit.

I will share one story.

We tried many things to help our anxious daughter.  She came out of the womb a worrier.  She had the weight of the world on her shoulders at the age of 5.  We were fortunate enough to have an amazing pediatrician who listened to us.  Our doctor mentioned Dawn’s book series as a possible resource.  At the time, I did not realize what a lifeline these books were for our family during a very intense period.

Dawn defines worry as a thought that upsets you and makes you feel bad inside. 

What an incredibly, simple, effective definition to articulate something that affects all of us one time or another.  I believe there are 3 main reasons these books are so helpful for families:

Communication

Anxiety can be a tricky thing to talk about from a young child and parents’ point of view.  At the beginning of this journey there may be only a child’s symptoms not yet known as anxiety like tummy aches or not being able to fall asleep that may have parents start to search for answers.  We went through this book together.  It enabled us to start the conversation with our daughter about what she was feeling, how she was feeling and why – it gave her words and acknowledgement of what she was feeling when she was having a hard time explaining it us and herself.

Learning Alongside Your Child 

As parents we do worry about our children and their wellbeing, we could all benefit from this wise book.  Dawn’s amazing ability to simply explain emotions and create analogies that make sense for both children and parents provides a platform for learning together.  I would read some parts and my daughter would read some parts.  We did a little each day.  We found we learned digestible bits to help understand and minimize the overwhelm. 

Practical Exercises for Anxiety Toolkit

I remember feeling a tremendous sense of relief when months after the book, my daughter was still using the exercises to help cope.  These exercises to this day from circle breathing to meditation and visualization are all things she uses in her coping toolkit as a teenager.  You may have to modify or change it up what is right for your child.  I have one memory of trying to institute worry time.  Dawn suggests having a worry time each day.  If my daughter brought up a worry multiple times during the day, we would say something like lets’ save that worry for worry time.  Our first worry time was before she went to bed.  This tended to be a high anxiety worry time for her as soon as her head hit the pillow.  Wow, that was a mistake. 😊

Worry time before bed did not work for us but worry time after school for 10 minutes did work. This practice uses the same principal of writing down all the things you have to do or worry about to get it out of your head -  and as a result feel less overwhelmed.

We are so grateful for Dawn taking the time and helping our community with her wonderful insights and videos.  Our hope is to spread the word about her amazing way of supporting families, kids and all those emotions.

Sperry