School stress, sleep and learning differences (dyslexia and adhd)
“I find the nights long, for I sleep but little, and think much”
Charles Dickens
Do any of these sound familiar in your family?
...I am trying to fall asleep, but I can’t!
...my mind is racing and I can’t turn off my thoughts.
...I slept all night long, why am I still so tired?
...I am so sleepless, it feels like I toss and turn all night.
Struggles with sleep and insomnia can have a huge impact on our daily lives. When kids have a learning difference, the challenges with sleep can often be exacerbated (hint...stress often has a hand in this!). We know sleep is so important for our kids (and for us as parents!), so we brought in Psychologist, Author and Coach, Dr. Ashley Olivine to share some of her expertise around sleep.
Let’s consider the cycle that can often occur:
Learning differences provide unique challenges and there are often additional stressors faced by those with learning differences (feeling behind, feeling singled out, not understanding things in school, feeling disorganized, feeling shame etc.).
When there are additional stressors in someone’s life, this can often lead to loss of sleep (yes, we all know that feeling!).
Less sleep can lead to increased stress and a harder time concentrating, listening, learning etc.
And here we see how the cycle can start.
So what do we do to help with this sleep and stress cycle for our kids with learning differences? Here are some tips to help us to break the cycle.
We need to keep in mind that stress does not have to be the reaction to the (potential) stressor caused by learning differences (easier said than done, but something to work towards!). The stress response to the situation and circumstances around having a learning difference can be helped through thought processes, support and outlook.
Stress is one of the biggest causes of insomnia. Insomnia includes difficulty falling asleep, staying asleep, returning to sleep, or getting quality sleep (we can try to help this through stress relief, stress prevention etc.).
We need to set up good sleep habits and help set our kids up for success with sleep. This could include ensuring the bedroom feels comfy and cozy and trying to stick to routines. Also we need to train our brain to see our bed as a place for sleeping (not reading, looking at our phone, watching tv, or thinking!). When we stay in bed while we are tossing and turning, the wrong associations can be created with our bed. Instead, set up a thinking spot, such as a chair beside the bed to go to if your mind is racing too much to go to sleep, then try getting in bed again once you feel more sleepy so that bed remains a place associated with actually going to sleep (not a place to revisit the day or our to-do list!).
We need to celebrate learning differences, help our kids to see and accept both their strengths and struggles, and celebrate opportunities for growth. We need to make sure our kids feel understood, heard, and seen at home and at school.
In order to best support our kids, all parts of the cycle need to be addressed - sleep, stress and learning differences (since they all work together!). We need to intentionally dig deep to address the problems from the source of what is causing them, rather than trying to fix them from the surface.
If you are interested in learning more about sleep, stress and learning differences, check out Dr. Ashley Olivine’s SYT Learn Masterclass in our FREE SYT Support Library.
We also have some great Masterclasses around owning your learning difference (with Jonathan Mooney) and helping to deal with anxiety and worries (with Dr. Dawn Huebner) which can both also be found in our Support Library! Check it out now.